March 16 2003

Date: Sunday March 16, 2003
Theme: St. Paddy's Day Hash
Hares: Dribbles, Ski Bobbitt
Start: Clarke’s in South Station, Boston
Beer Check: next to a housing project near the Mass Pike
On In: Biddy Early's, Pearl St. Boston (they opened especially for us)
Time: 12:30 p.m. HST
Total Distance: 5 or so miles
Scribe: Cums Alone
Weather: a sunny 50 degree day, but with the wind off Boston Harbor, it got
cold again

Hashers Present: Dribbles (hare), Ski Bobbitt (hare), Just Amy, Anal
Avenger, Biker Chick, Cockpit (aka Hot T*ts Hoolihan), Cream Whora, Cum
Chowdah, Cums Alone (me, the scribe), Friar F*ck, F*cks Like a Rrrrabbit,
Grease My Monkey's Nuts, Just Helen (3 or so hashes?), Hare Club for Qu*ers,
Hot for Tots, The Jizzmopper, Lame Canada, Lickety Slit, Master Gator,
Muffalotta, Pat My Fly, Prom Cream, Public Access, Puff-n-Stuff, Shine On
Harvard Moon, Snoreplay, Stuff Me, Sugar Plum Fairy, Swells Like Torn *nus,
Virginia Slim, Who's Ron Jeremy? You're Not My Daddy

Virgins: Jana and Ed

Visitors: Boitano's Hard On (Seattle H3, hash cash out there), Just Becky
(Nittany Valley H3), Circus Seal (Nittany Valley H3), Nookie Monster (San
Diego H3), Bort (San Diego H3)

Late Cummers: Impo-tent, Sponge Bath Square Pants (he had to pack because
the Air Force is shipping him out today)

Friends of Dribbles at the bar: Allison & her mom

The Start and the Run:
Hashers, resplendent in varying shades of green, were gathered for a
pre-lube inside of Clarke's at South Station. Ski and Dribbles finally got
everyone outside for an explanation of marks. Blessedly, there were no real
odd marks, but all falses would not be marked. The hash took off toward the
Children's Museum, then down to Seaport Blvd. to the World Trade Center and
up the stairs. Trail then went back over Congress Street to West Broadway
and the Saint Patrick's Day Parade crowd. We blended in so well with the
drunken revelers that the pack got pretty fragmented. After a circle jerk
under the Broadway bridge, trail went under the SE Expressway, past the Pine
Street Inn through a yet to be yuppified section of the South End. After
being pelted with snowballs by urchins in a housing project, we finally
happened upon the beer (and Jamison's) check in an alley off the Mass Pike
behind the projects. Hashers imbibed and sang and had great St. Patrick's
day fun.

From the Beer Check, trail wound through the Theatre District and Chinatown.
We then passed through Downtown Crossing to the Financial District. Finally
we arrived at the on-in. Biddy Early's Bar is owned by a friend of Dribbles.
Although normally closed on Sunday, she had opened the bar especially for
the hash. We had a whole bar to ourselves.

The on in:

Puff & Stuff was RA, but was having trouble keeping the unruly pack's
attention. Comments on the run included: "It's a giant circle jerk, like
Ski's whole life", "Sh*tty Trail", "Not enough whining on trail". The hares
did their down down and sang "When It's Hog Calling Time in Nebraska".

Visitors: Boitano's Hard On (had to leave early, so he missed this), Just
Becky, Circus Seal, Nookie Monster and Bort were given a down down and sang
the "C*nt Valley Loupie" song.

Virgins:
Shine On was yet again dementoress for the virgins. She ordered them onto
their knees.

Virgin Jana said that Just Helen made her cum, and she likes it on top.
Virgin Ed said that no one made him cum, but it was noted that there were
several present who could help him out with that. If he were on a busload of
homos*xuals, he said he would get off. And even with Virgin Jana's help, he
said that the square root of 69 was 8.3 (not quite).
The virgins were given their down down, and were welcomed to the hash. Jana
started to sing some Irish song about working on the railroad, but she
forgot most of the words, so Sugar Plum Fairy sang the rest of it for her.

Accusations:
New Shoes: Friar (he got his beer strained through F*cks Like a Rrrrabbit's
sock, also Hare Club may have gotten a down down for changing into old shoes
first.

Jizz and Torn An*s also got a down down for running a r*ce or for already
being drunk, I'm not sure which (they had been drinking since 11 am).

Ski got a down down for his poor imitation of Whine Rack.

Hashus Interuptis: F*cks Like a Rrrrabbitt hasn't been around in awhile,
since she went around the world. Also Just Amy, Just Helen and Iron Juggies
have been backsliding. All were given a down down.

Oh yes, and due to Deep Throat's hot line message, she had her new name
reaffirmed by the hash: he is officially named Whine Rack.

Quotes and other dirt: nope, nothing to report this week. %-)

—- Cums Alone, your humble scribe

whew … is there a full moon hash tomorrow? So many hashes, so many fewer
brain cells to kill.

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