February 9 2003

Date: Sunday February 9, 2003
Start: Victory Pub on Bennington Avenue, East Boston
Theme: July 3rd part deux - 90 degrees 100% humidity and sticky
Beer Checks (2): next to a salt marsh and in Freebie's back yard
On In: Dockage Billiard Club, East Boston
Hares: Petting Officer, Stuff Me & Velvet Pelvis
Time: 1:30 p.m. HST
Total Distance: lost eagles maybe 4, rest of us 3
Scribe: Cums Alone
Weather: below freezing, icy and snow covered terrain

Hashers Present: Petting Officer Sucking *ss, (hare), Stuff Me (hare),
Velvet Pelvis (hare), It's a Free C*nt (not a hare, but second BC was at her
place), Anal Avenger, Cream Whora, Cum Prick Pow, Cums Alone (scribe), Just
Elizabeth (3 hashes), Friar F*ck, Hare Club for Qu*ers, Impo-tent, Just
Jamie (hash 8+), The Jizzmopper, Just Lauge (3 hashes), Mom’s Cumming, Just
Nicole (3 hashes), One Drunk Walking, Pat My Fly, Pond Scum, Prom Cream,
Puff-n-Stuff, Pussy F*rt, Just Rene (2 hashes), Shine On Harvard Moon,
Sh*tty Trail, Snoreplay, Sponge Bath Square Pants, Just Stacy (2 hashes),
Sugar Plum Fairy, Swells Like Torn *nus, Viagra Doubtfire, Wee Willie
Wanker, Just William (3 hashes), WinToes69

Late Cummers: none

Virgins: Aruna (from Kuala Lumpur), Matt

Visitors: Sphinctersicle (Hartford H3), Bang Cock (Orlando H3),

The Start and the Run:
This was the antithesis of the death march hash of last July. Try as they
might, the hares could not make the weather hot. It was cold and frosty,
with a wind blowing across Boston Harbor right at us in East Boston.
Brrrrrr! Trail had been prelaid, all the better for snowmelt to wipe out the
marks. We took off from the bar over toward Winthrop. It was cold going
across the causeway through the salt marsh. We wound through streets of
Winthrop and then up an embankment through a cemetery to the first beer
check, with scenic Boston vistas across the marsh. We quickly quaffed the
proffered brews and moved onward, thus better to avoid hypothermia. The
turkey eagle split lead the eagles further up into Winthrop over toward Deer
Island. The turkeys headed back toward Revere. After a few checks, all of
the pack made it past the Madonna Shrine (with the blinking red light atop,
go figure that Madonna would have a shrine in East Boston). Anyway, not far
below the shrine was beer check number 2, in Freebie's back yard. The frozen
pack attempted to stay warm while drinking cold beers. Eventually all of the
FRBs who took the eagle trail showed up, even finally the Jizzmopper, who
had gotten quite lost. From BC2, the on in was only another half mile. In
the bowels of a building … a dark subterranean pool hall (which
inexplicably had really good Italian cookies for sale at the bar … not a
problem, just odd to pair cookies and beer).

The on in:

Puff & Stuff was RA, yet again. He had thoughtfully obtained a tray of snow
from outside for the hares to sit upon. Comments from the frozen pack
included: "I'm just hung over", "Ice them", "Oh Look, brown snow", "not
enough crap", "*ss the hare", "Titicaca", "Not my fault, it's wet out",
"chalk is not a scarce commodity". The hares did their down down. And then
they sang us a pathetic version of Father Abraham, which got them a second
down down.

Visitors: The Jizzmopper (BMH3), Bang Cock and Sphinctersicle (Sphincter has
been added to my list, tho, since he spends his weekends in Belmont) were
given a down down.

Shine On, in her role of dementoress, ordered the virgins onto their knees.
Virgin Matt said that Just Lauge made him cum, prompting Shine On to ask "Is
Lauge long?" To which Matt answered, "you hope so". His favorite barnyard
animal is the dog.
Virgin Aruna said that Shine On made her cum. She said that the square root
of 69 was 8 point something. Prompting a comment that Asians know their
The virgins were given their down down, and are virgins no more.

Naming: Just Jamie (or is it Jaime?) was overdue for a name. At least I
have a chance of spelling a hash name correctly. Anyway, despite all the
dirt we had on her, or maybe because of it, she finally received her name.
She teaches high school history, and chaperones high school dances, but her
wild sorority days included pillow fights with her sorority sisters, while
all were clad in their lacy underwear. Anyway, she also started and stopped
her stopwatch while hashing. She was not named, Check My Split, Rob Blow,
Greased by Nuts, Jamie Lamie, Pillow Biter, nor Tw*t for Teacher. She was
finally named Lickety Slit.

Visitors: Jizz, Bang Cock and Sphinctersicle were given a down down.

Backsliding: Velvet Pelvis, Muffalotta and Viagra Doubtfire were given a
down down for neglecting to cum to the hash.
New Shoes: Snoreplay and Cream Whora got to teabag each other. Yummy.
Private Party: Pussy F*rt, Cum Prick Pow Just Rene and possibly Just Stacy,
for ignoring the circle

We did swing low, and had lots of pizza and more beer. The hares, in an
incredible effort to overcum the stigma of their disastrous hash last July
3, had arranged for pool tables for those hashers so inclined. There was
also a lot of air hockey action going on, with Just Elizabeth generally
annihilating the entire hash.

"You just wait, I'm going to start f*rting all over the place" - Just Rene
"There should be a tag on that toe" - Prom Cream
"Don't cheat if you're not good at it." - Prom Cream

Oh, and after the hash of last week, BH3 has renamed Madame Flutterby
"Fluttergay", since he was supposed to leave early to get back to the Happy
Valley Hash, and although he found out that it was cancelled, he left our
hash early anyway.

—- Cums Alone, your humble scribe

Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License