April 18th, 2004 - Marathon Hangover Hash

Okay, here is one of the hash trashes from Marathon weekend. The pub crawl was great, but I was not taking notes (and in no shape to do so). I will finish the Saturday hash trash after Hare Club for Queers gives me the list of who was there (over 100 hashers). Cums Alone

Date: April 18, 2004
Hares: Cum Prik Pow, Mom's Cumming
Theme: Hangover Hash
Start: The Bean Town Pub, Tremont St. Boston
Beer Check: in Cambridge behind the Lechmere T stop in a lot along the railroad yards
On-in: The Courtside Restaurant, Cambridge St. Cambridge
On-After: Cambridgeport Saloon
Time: 2:30 p.m. HST
Total Distance: 1 or so miles
Scribe: Cums Alone
Weather: 60+ degrees, sunny to a bit overcast

Hashers Present: Cum Prik Pow (hare), Mom's Cumming (hare), Anal Beads, At Your Cervix, Bumble Beaver, Cums Alone (scribe), Doggie Treat, Double Flush, Just Eric (6 hashes), Friar F*ck, Gag Reflex (I had an interesting typo with an F versus G), Harpoontang, He's My B*tch, High An*s, Holy O Zone, Hung Like a Jew, Master Gator, More Head, My Wife's a Virgin, Nipples Erectus, No Vacancy, One Drunk Watching, Paris Sucks! Pat My Fly, Picklemebutt, Public Nuisance, Puff-n-Stuff, Rectal, Just Rick (5 hashes), Shine On Harvard Moon, Shorn Scrotum, Sugar Plum Fairy, Velvet Pelvis, You're Not My Daddy

At the start, but had to go to Mississippi: Sponge Bath Square Pants
Dogs: Virgin Mookie, Shitty Trail
Virgins: none, other than the dog

Visitors: Just Al (Buffalo H3), Cum Titty (Seacoast H3), Dainty Pyles (from NY, but living here now), Dances with Spam (Jersey Gypsies), Dr. Queer Medicine Man (Albany), Just Ellen (Buffalo H3), Finger Lickin Good (Ottawa H3),Fossil (Baltimore/Annapolis H3), Lil’ Fast Fuck (Boise), Lips & *ssholes (Burlington), Nipolean, Peace O'Chum (Albany), Pop Top, Pulsating Pussy (Boise), Scratch & Sniff, Stinky Queef (Albany), Tattoo My Scrotum (Kansas City area, originally Boston)

Late Cummers: Cock Climber, Heat Seeking Nipple Finder, Lube Me In, Sucks it Down South, Viagra Doubtfire and probably a few others

The Start and the Run:

Hashers wandered into the Bean Town Pub at an incredibly slow rate. The weekend partying had taken its toll. Finally, we had enough hashers to start a trail. We circled in the alley outside for the trail mark explanation. The hares were using chalk arrows with "FB" (Fat Boy) to distinguish trail from the previous day's trail (which marks were all around the start). Due to the usual hashing inefficiencies, the Sunday trail would be crossing over the Saturday trail, at least a few times.

After a few warm up songs, to let the hares get on with their live trail, we dashed off in pursuit of trail. We did a rather nice circle jerk around A, and then through Downtown Crossing, down the steps into the T. Sure enough, there was Cum Prik Pow, dispensing T tokens to the pack. He instructed all to get onto the Green Line to Lechmere, and then to get off.

We were among the quieter group of T riding hashers. The other train had the singers, who apparently frightened the civilians so much that almost the entire trainload of passengers debarked at the Museum of Science.

From the T stop at Lechmere, trail went off into the industrial wasteland by the railroad yard. The beer check was maybe 400 meters from the T stop. Other than a police van that went by (and didn't stop), and some splashing of toxic waste, the beer check was uneventful. From the BC, trail wound around the far side of the Lechmere T stop, then up Cambridge Street to the on-in at the Courtside Restaurant and bar (home of $10 pitchers of PBR, which was supposed to include food, but they forgot about us). Total length of trail (not counting the T ride)??? Maybe a mile or so.

The on in:

Puff-n-Stuff was RA. Comments on the run included: "Lovely Trail", "We scared tourists on the T", "Suck Up", "Too many Falses", "Not enough dead bodies", "not enough toxic waste", "too short", "not enough beer checks", "trail of the year". The hares did their down down, and sang "Whip it out at the ballgame". Naming: Although Mookie was a virgin dog, he was named. In a unanimous vote, he will now be known as Great Brown Beaver Hunter. Anal Beads got to do a proxy down down for his dog, since Mookie doesn't like beer.

Nippy contributed the following for the pack's understanding of doggie style: "What is a Canadian's favorite s*xual position? Doggie Style, so both can watch the hockey game."

Accusations:

  • Same Shirt - Friar F, Puff-n-Stuff
  • Primping at start (applying lipstick): Paris Sucks! (to which she responded "I'm French, okay?")
  • Hooking up at the hash: One Drunk Watching, Dr. Queer, Paris Sucks!, Peace O’Chum, At Your Cervix
  • Sweat Test: Master Gator, One Drunk Watching, At Your Cervix (she drove bag car, and others rode)
  • Picklemebutt got a down down, since he was named on Easter Sunday AFTER the circle.
  • False accusation - Hung Like a Jew accusing Picklemebutt of being British

We wrapped up the circle, and had pizza. Then it was decided that $10 per pitcher was too pricey, so there was a pilgrimage made over to the Cambridgeport, where hashers drank beer until closing time.

Quotes:

  • "Got beer?" - Regarding Nippy with a beer mustache.
  • "Doggie Treat needs your butt."
  • "Hash smarter, not faster." - Cums Alone
  • "Maybe Lechmere's a false." - Anal Beads (I think)
  • "I hug from behind." - Lips & As*holes to Tattoo My Scrotum
  • "No Bogarting the pitcher in the corner!"

- Cums Alone, your humble scribe

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